Every time I hop on social media — be it Facebook, Instagram or Twitter — there’s usually some random dude posting, reposting, sharing or retweeting some stupid meme or quote that some other random dude made about “women these days.”
The same, ignorant ish about how our eyebrows look like Nike signs, how we wear way too much makeup, how our weaves are too long, and/or how our bodies look too fake. Or how we’re too crazy, can’t cook, and don’t know how to treat a man. Blah, blah, freaking blah. Point is, y’all fellas are very vocal about the things you like and don’t like in a woman.
I’ve asked guys what they consider to be the “ideal woman,” or as Erin and I like to call her, a “10.” Most of them said she has to be smart, attractive, well put-together, ambitious and able to carry a good conversation. OK cool. Now fellas, real quick. Get up, spin around three times, snap your fingers, and sit back down. Anything happen? Did your dream girl fall right into your lap? No? Sigh. Well I guess that means you actually have to get up and do something to get her.
The problem with many of you young lads is that y’all be wanting “the works” when it comes to your future wifey, but don’t want to put in “the work” to get her. Y’all out here trying to win a dime with a penny’s worth of effort.
So below are five principles on how to PROPERLY score a 10:
- Be respectful. When a nice young lady catches your eye, come correct. If you decide to call down the street after her to get her attention, nine times out of nine, she will ignore you and keep walking. A 10 generally doesn’t respond to cat-calling. ESPECIALLY if she is wearing heels taller than three inches. Baby girl’s feet are most likely in severe distress, so she is on a diehard mission to get back to her car so she can kick them mugs right off and throw on them flip flops she’s got on standby. The last thing she wants, no, needs is some random, ignorant negro yelling, “Ay, yo, baby! In the blue dress! Can I talk to you real quick?!” No. That is the most you will get out of a 10 with that approach. For the most part, trying to get a woman’s attention when she’s already walking can be a bit tricky, because you don’t want her to feel threatened. But we’ll get more into this later. As for now, just keep in mind that cat-calling is a firm, solid nope.
- Be confident. A lot of women who got their ish together believe that many men are intimidated by them. And a lot of times, it’s true. But the last thing women want is a man who is easily intimidated and seems unsure of himself. Every woman needs to know that she is safe and secure with the man she is with. So when you step to her, look her in the eyes, smile, speak clearly and spark up a pleasant conversation. Don’t be cocky with it, but show her that you’re not afraid of a challenge.
- Be consistent. There is nothing more off-putting than an indecisive, inconsistent man. Consistency and confidence actually go hand in hand because they both give the woman a since of security and comfort. They let her know that you’ve got it covered and that you know what you’re doing. A 10 doesn’t entertain word games and idle chatter. She will listen to the words that come directly out of your mouth and will wait to see if you will follow up everything you said with ACTION. So if you’re trying to score a 10, you might as well leave them childish games at home, put your grown-man poker face on, and play your cards right.
- Be sincere. Don’t try to put on a front to impress her. Eventually, she will see right through all that. Just be real and show her the real you. Tell her what’s on your mind and what you plan to accomplish in life. Share your dreams and goals with her. A 10 loves a man with a vision and purpose.
- Pay attention. Listen to her. Like seriously. Take a sincere interest in what she shares with you and try to see things from her perspective. Be conscious of the little things she tells you, like her favorite food or movie, and store them in your memory bank for a later date. Then just randomly mention that little thing she told you in a future conversation and she’ll know you were listening. And listening gets you brownie points. You’re welcome.
My sissy and I will be diving more into each of these in our upcoming segments, so stay tuned!
In the meantime, we wanna hear from you. Fellas, what was your best or worst experience with approaching a woman? And ladies, what was your best or worst experience with getting approached my a man? Drop a comment below!